Me: You can't have a mental health day tomorrow, I have to be at school to help with the walk-a-thon. But I will pretend I don't know you if you still want that.
Carter: All of my friends say you aren't a cool mom.
Me: WHAT? What friends?
Carter: My cool friends.
Me: Why do they say I am not a cool mom? (Try not to panic, breathe, breathe)
Carter: They just do.
Me: But WHY? What did I do? (Why are these 5th graders judging me?)
Carter: They think you aren't cool because you don't have a tattoo.
Me: Do they have tattoos?
Carter: (smirk) No.
Me: Then I don't think they are cool either.